Category Archives: WEEKLY BLOGS

Your Bicycle Does All The Work

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My wife Adriana is big into bicycling, she rides every weekend and do a lot of long distance races for charity, like the MS150 or the Bike Around the Bay. These charity races are very long, usually a two day race covering 70 to 90 miles per day.

When she started she had a three hundred dollar bike she purchased from a rider friend who convinced her that it was a lot of fun. Keep in mind that Adriana did like to bicycle before, mainly on mountain roads and she was happy to get into the sport again.

Spending three hundred dollars for a bicycle seems steep to me, I have seen them in Academy for hundred dollars; her friend tells me that she spend eight hundred dollars for that bike when it was new couple years earlier and she was ready to upgrade to a two thousand dollar model; so she was more than happy to sell it for a good price to someone who would enjoy it. I was just wandering why she would spend that kind of money when Academy have them brand new for hundred dollars plus tax. Isn’t a new 2019 model what we call and upgrade?

She started riding Saturdays and sometimes Sundays, by the time she was done each day she was very tire when she came home. That is great work out I always tell her while sitting on the couch watching re-runs of Cheers.

As time went by she started complaining about her shoes, they were not the right shoes for bicycling, they needed to have cleats, I don’t know much about women’s shoes but when I had shoes with cleats I was playing football, I was wondering if she wasn’t bicycling in the weekends but rather playing ball with the boys at soccer field. Not having the right shoes turned into not having the right bicycle, that did make me happy, I figured I could sell her eight hundred dollar bicycle for four hundred, recoup the initial three hundred dollars and use the extra one hundred dollars to buy a brand spanking new bicycle at Academy.

Did I say Academy? I was thinking Walmart, but she was thinking the Bike Barn Bicycle shop. One evening she dragged me to the shop to look at bicycles, I was more than willing to go, I was ready to sell that bike and breakout even. I figured we would do couple stops, the Bike Barn and then Academy and finally I would convinced her that whatever they had at Academy we could get cheaper at Walmart. I could have never been so wrong in so many levels.

The Bike Barn has rows of bicycles of any kind, I didn’t know you couldn’t ride your road bicycle on the dirt; Did something happened during my college years that I missed? When I was younger we got a bicycle for Christmas and we rode that bike on any kind of terrain, in fact I don’t think mine even had gears but I was the fastest rider in my neighborhood. Going back to the shop, I looked all the bikes and I couldn’t find any bicycle under five hundred dollars unless you were looking for your three year old daughter and then you could purchase the Sun’s Lil Kitt’n bicycle for just a few more dollars over one hundred.

I was looking on my GPS for the closest Walmart and was about to dashed out of the store when my wife stopped me to tell me she was waiting for Steve the salesman. Apparently she had already spoken to Steve and had a bicycle in mind. A tall handsome guy came out of the repair area and greeted my wife with such a big smile I could swear I have seen him before in the soccer field. Your bike is ready he said, I was speechless, I looked at my wife, my wife looked at Steve, Steve looked at me and three thousand dollars later we walked out of the store.

While we were in the car I finally could mutter a word out of my mouth and I said, that is not the bicycle I had in mind, and Adriana with a straight face answered, I know, but they will change the pedals tomorrow so I can get the shoes with the cleats.

Multiple Sclerosis ride – Houston to Austin

Packing For The Last Time In Your Life

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This may not be what most people want to read, but, if you are reading it, perhaps it’s for curiosity and not because someone is reading you the last rites.

Sooner or later we all have to go, some will go to heaven, some will go to Hell and some will go and ask for directions. No matter when you have to go it’s important to know what you are going wear for the last time. I have never seen that written in a will but may be you should. I wouldn’t want to end up asking directions wearing corduroy pants and a t-shirt with the slogan, “I’m your sugar daddy, what are you doing tonight” unless you are a sugar daddy and your babes are coming to get the last check.

I noticed on a recent funeral viewing that the person in the casket was wearing a beautiful laced dress with precious jewels, a very well manicured hand with fingers layered in gold and diamond rings and a set of pearl earrings that could make any woman want to steal it in order to walk the red carpet. In a very solemn voice I said to my friend, your mother looks beautiful, I love her dress, and she replied, it was her favorite, she was always borrowing it from my sister, it’s a Valentino. I looked at her sister for a moment as I said, she is getting cremated, right?

Unless is in your will, your family will be picking up your last outfit of your life. Pray before you die you don’t end up with those corduroies

If you happen to be the chosen one to do the picking, make sure when you pick the outfit and the Jewelry you keep in mind that they are going to end up ten feet underground or a dust of golden ashes. Make sure your relatives are not counting on keeping those clothes or any accessories for themselves. Ask before you accessorize. Remember, “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure”

As for me, I’m not putting it in a will, you can keep all my clothes, “for you are dust and to dust you shall return”

La Petite Marche

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It’s 10 am and I gather with my friends to have le petit déjeuner. Talk about trying to eat breakfast with Twenty two friends from high school, all I hear is words like bonjour, hello, S’il vous plaît madame, and on and on. These are special friends, we graduated from high school in Belgium and we have reunions very often, this time is Montreal, but it has been, Chicago, Miami, Ft Lauderdale, Houston, Cincinnati, Las Vegas, Pioneer in California, Brussels twice, Seattle twice, two cruises, Baltimore, New Orleans and New York city twice, talk about people with no careers and no hope to retire.

Is sunny today, I’m not wearing my long Johns, I left my heavy jacket at the hotel but I’m layered well; heavy vest on top of a pullover on top of a turtleneck on top of a t-shirt. Time to go.

As we leave the restaurant and we stand outside, all I hear is

¡Call an Uber!

All phones come out of the holster, twenty some people needs to get to Mount Royal, it’s the race to grab the first car or station wagon that shows up, whoever is left behind will have to pay for his own Uber, some of us will share….. the ride, not the bill.

“I jump into a car, six of us ride confortable, some conversation starts going in the back, I’m not listening but my ear stands still when I hear Susan say” My boobs can meet my knees” I didn’t ask any questions, I’ll wait to get out… and verify.

Mont Royal is a high hill overlooking the city, tourist flock to this spot to catch a glimpse at the city landscape while they chant words like oh la la. I simply take some pictures and go on my way. My classmates continue to chant oh la la.

Time is running out, before dinner we Must see old Montréal and a display of lights at the Botanical Garden. Old Montreal didn’t seem as old as I thought and the lights didn’t glow, Claude forgot to buy tickets to the sold out show.

We rushed to the Metro station to catch a ride to some Heineken place in St Denis street, I swallow my beer in one gulp, Adriana took two sips and we left in a hurry, we only had one hour to make it back for dinner. Walk… Metro… Walk

Brush my hair… Adriana change clothes…. Put a jacket, walk… Metro…. Walk

Damm, my phone is going dead, is a good thing I have the restaurant ping on my phone.

Honey we are here, no we are not she says, this is the breakfast place, Damm again, so where is the restaurant I said, I only have 2% left on my phone, let me call Claude.

Claude, where is the restaurant…. Hellooo… Where is the restaurant…. it’s at 330 Marie Ann Street…. Hello…. hello… Phone shuts down… Honey did you get that? Yes, 33 Marie Jane Street

Escuse moi mecier, do you know where Mari Jane St is, oh oui 10 streets that way, merci… We start walking. 13 streets later, we back track 3 streets and by a miracle of who knows what we found the restaurant. We entered with a big applause, I was so happy to see my friends, right away I join the Canadian and Latin American wine society, Adriana just wanted to catch up on the wine drinking competition.

I’m Drowning

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I’m leaving the house this morning and don’t know what to pack.

It has been raining for 24 hours, the streets are flooding and I don’t know what to put on, my tall boots or my short boots.

Reality is I should have stay home, but I didn’t. My wife didn’t have to go to school which meant we both had to be home, so I went out, I put on my short boots and packed in the car the long boots, I assume everyone has two pairs of boots at home right?

I was driving around thinking about what do you pack in a long flight, I need to write about that, I know I always wear very comfortable pants, jeans do not do well on the crotch on long flights.

I never been on a flight where the temperature is above 75° F or 24°C but I see a lot of people in shorts, t’shirts, flip flops and a cuban guayabera. Maybe next time you take a long flight you will think why they give you a blanket, and instead of flaunting your cool t-shirt with the logo “No I AM NOT ON F*!#ING FACEBOOK” wear a shirt and a jacket.

Anyway, so I kept driving around, I hate long flights, I kind of realized that my behind is too flat, too much bone and not enough meat, three hours into a flight my derriere starts hurting so I take the pillow and use it as a cushion. Since I always ask for a window seat, I use the blanket as a pillow and lean against the window.

The rain never stopped, this tropical depression Imelda wants to hang out for a while, you ever wonder why they call it a depression? I guess it’s what you get when you can’t get out of the house on fear that you may flood or the fear that once you got out you can’t get back home.

So, I decided to beat the odds and try to make it home, it was depressing. Thank you Imelda.  I wonder what shoes my wife would have chosen. 

Flash Flood In Houston

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If you live in Houston or surrounding area, we have a lot of rain this week; it means flood streets, flood homes, damage cars and more political promises.

Every election we vote to fix the flood issues in Houston and what I don’t understand is why is coming up on a ballot in November again.

In the meantime, don’t forget to pack your umbrella, may be a pair of boots, and a long rope is not a bad idea.

Stay home if you can, but if you need to venture out stay away from high water or just any passage that looks flooded but not too deep, just because it’s only one foot deep doesn’t mean it can’t carry your car downstream.

Why the long rope? Just in case you are the adventurous one, then you will try to pass a high water area with your super duty 4×4 I can go anywhere and find yourself minutes later climbing out of your truck into the top of the cabin and wishing you listen to me and carry the long rope to help the rescuers get to you.

Be safe today, I’m home wishing I had a 4×4 and be adventurous like you are.

Don’t Forget Your Raincoat

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I’m looking at the news and I see FLASH FLOOD WARNING!

Right away I started thinking that we tend to forget the raincoat or the umbrella when we travel. And then; rain, rain rain……

Fortunately my wife is the weather guru in this family, she is always looking at the weather forecast where we are going, mainly she wants to make sure there is plenty of sun and a beach to fry all day.

So, she would say things like it’s too cold at this time of the year, or it has been raining, or how many bathing suits I should take. The reality is that I’m not a big beach bum, I prefer to walk the streets and photograph the people and the scenery, but it’s important to know when is the rainy season, has it been raining a lot lately and should I carry an umbrella or a raincoat.

A raincoat will take a lot of room, but if it rains a lot, make a sacrifice and take a raincoat, otherwise a small umbrella will be fine. Now if you prefer to ignore my post, them pack one of those cheap plastic ponchos you can buy in Walmart (See picture) that weights about 1oz

Rain Poncho

If you are going to ignore the umbrella or raincoat, I would buy more than one poncho, I guarantee you will thank me later.

Amen!

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The verb Finishes with ED

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I wrote some of these comments in my Welcome page, just a reminder.

Ok, so English is not my native language, I’m not always copying in Microsoft Word to see if I’m writing correctly, in fact many times I don’t because I’m too busy writing and don’t want to lose concentration.

What am I talking about?

Did you ever see the show Lucy with Ricky Ricardo?

Ok, so I talk and write the same way. You are going to have to ignore my grammar. if the verb was supposed to have ED at the end like talk and talked, and don’t mean past tense, I write it like a hear it, if I put a comma and it was a period it’s because I write like a talk, may be sometimes too fast, may be sometime my English gets confuse with my Spanish, you know what I mean just like it happens to you when you are speaking your second or third language.

I asked my friends for grammar suggestions and my friend Kelly said, you write like you talk, it’s funny, you should leave it like that because that is you.

Thank you Kelly, I’m not going to worry, it is what it is.

Sunset in Tomine, Colombia.
Sunset in Tominé, Colombia.

Packing For Overnight Trip

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I promised my sister I’ll come by tonight and visit. It’s a long trip, by that I mean I have to drive 50 minutes to the other side of the city. Damm! I forgot it’s Friday 5pm, it will be hour and fifteen minutes. Why do I promise to come by on Fridays?

Now I will have to stay because I don’t want to drive back late at night so let me grab a small bag or backpack and put all my stuff in there, basically a full change of clothes, my PJs, hairbrush and toothbrush.

I’m not planning to stay late, I have a lot o do tomorrow so I’ll plan to escape early, may be skip breakfast and hit McDonalds on the way home, if I tell her I’ll stay for breakfast, it will be noon before I get out. sorry sister.

I love visiting family but I am not crazy about spending the night, if it is the whole weekend, no problem, but just for the night I rather wake up in my bed ready to do whatever it is I really don’t have to do.

Ok, so go an spend some time with your family, if you decide to drive back home don’t blame me, I told you not to forget your Pjs.

Xavier